Grief Coaching
Steady support for your loss.
Grief changes the way the world feels. It can make time feel strange, make ordinary tasks feel heavy, and bring up emotions that don’t always make sense in the moment. Some days you may feel raw and open. Other days you may feel numb, distant, or strangely “fine,” and then wonder if something is wrong with you.
Nothing is wrong with you.
Grief is not a problem to solve. It’s a human response to love, change, and loss. And while there is no one right way to grieve, you also don’t have to navigate it alone.
I offer trauma-informed grief coaching to support you in finding steady ground, regulating your nervous system, and moving through loss with compassion and self-trust. Sessions are held online, and I work with clients across the East Coast and beyond.
When You’re Grieving, Everything Can Feel Different
Many people assume heartbreak is “just emotional,” but breakups often impact the entire nervous system. You may notice:
Persistent rumination or looping thoughts about your ex
Anxiety, tightness, or a constant sense of urgency
Difficulty sleeping, eating, or concentrating
Strong urges to reach out, check social media, or seek closure
A loss of confidence or sense of identity
These responses don’t mean something is wrong with you. They are common survival responses that arise when attachment, safety, and connection are disrupted. Breakup recovery coaching helps you understand and work with these responses rather than fighting or suppressing them.
Find Steady Ground After Loss
There’s a particular kind of disorientation that comes with grief. You may feel like you’re living in two worlds at once—the one that keeps moving and the one where something precious has changed forever. You might be trying to “be strong” for others while quietly falling apart inside. Or you may be tired of people expecting you to be “better” by now.
Grief coaching is a place where you don’t have to perform your healing. You can bring what’s real—sadness, anger, confusion, relief, guilt, longing, or the absence of feeling entirely—and we work gently from there.
When You’re Grieving, Everything Can Feel Different
Grief doesn’t only live in the mind. It lives in the body and nervous system, too. You might notice:
You can’t concentrate the way you used to.
Your sleep is disrupted, or you’re exhausted all the time.
Your chest feels tight, your stomach feels unsettled, or your breathing feels shallow.
You feel flooded by memories, or you feel strangely blank.
You swing between wanting closeness and wanting to disappear.
These are often signs that your system is trying to adapt to a reality it didn’t choose. Coaching helps you meet these responses with understanding instead of self-judgment—and helps you build practices that bring you back to steadiness, one moment at a time.
What Grief Coaching Is
Grief coaching is supportive, present-focused, and gently forward-moving. It’s a space to process what you’re carrying, understand what your nervous system is doing, and rebuild your capacity to live and function while you grieve.
This work is not about “moving on” or forcing closure. It’s about learning how to live in a way that honours what you’ve lost and supports what still matters to you.
In coaching, we may explore:
What feels hardest right now, and why.
What your grief is asking for—space, expression, meaning, rest, truth.
How to work with waves of emotion without being swept away by them.
How to reconnect with yourself and your voice during a time that can feel identity-shifting.
What Grief Coaching Is Not
This is coaching, not therapy or counseling. I am a trauma-informed coach with therapeutic training, but I am not a licensed clinician, and I do not diagnose or provide clinical treatment.
Coaching can be a deeply supportive resource, but it’s important to be clear about what it is. If you are in a crisis, feeling unsafe, or need clinical mental health support, I encourage you to seek immediate professional care in your area. We can also talk about how coaching may fit alongside other support you already have.
Who Grief Coaching Is For
Grief coaching may be a good fit if you’re feeling like:
You’re functioning on the outside but unraveling on the inside.
You don’t know how to carry this loss and still live your life.
You feel stuck in guilt, anger, or unanswered questions.
You’re tired of being told to “stay positive” or “be strong.”
You’re grieving in a way that others don’t understand.
It’s been a long time, but something still feels unresolved.
You do not need to be “ready” or articulate to begin. You only need to be willing to show up with what’s true.
Types Of Loss This Coaching Can Support
Grief takes many forms. You may be grieving:
The death of a loved one.
A relationship ending or a family shift.
A life chapter that closed before you were ready.
A future you imagined that now looks different.
A loss without closure—where things changed, but answers didn’t come.
The details matter, and your experience matters. Coaching offers a place where your grief doesn’t have to be compared or ranked to be valid.
What We’ll Work On Together
Grief work is tender. I won’t rush you, and I won’t try to talk you out of what you feel. We focus on helping your system feel steadier and your inner world feel more supported.
Nervous System Support During Grief
When grief is intense, your nervous system may swing between overwhelm and shutdown. We work with simple, practical tools to help you regulate—so you can breathe, sleep, and function more steadily, even while the grief is still here.
Making Space For The Truth Of What You Feel
Many people try to grieve “correctly.” They try to feel the right emotions in the right order, or they try to suppress what feels inconvenient. In coaching, you get to tell the truth—without being judged, fixed, or hurried.
Working With Guilt, Anger, And Unanswered Questions
Grief can bring complicated emotions: resentment, regret, relief, or anger at the unfairness of what happened. We make room for these experiences gently. Often, what feels “messy” is simply what hasn’t been allowed to be named.
Reclaiming Your Voice After Loss
Loss can silence people—internally or externally. You may struggle to express what you need, set boundaries, or even know what you feel. I incorporate voice-based healing practices (not voice training) to support expression, agency, and reconnection to your truth. Sometimes, finding your voice again is part of finding yourself again.
Creating A Life That Can Hold Both Love And Loss
Grief doesn’t end because you decide it should. But over time, it can become integrated—less like you’re drowning, more like you’re learning how to carry something sacred. Coaching supports you in building a life that can include both sorrow and meaning, without betraying what you’ve lost.
Elisa Monti’s Trauma-Informed Approach
Elisa Monti’s approach is trauma-informed, gentle, and grounded. I work with the understanding that grief can activate survival responses—especially if you’ve experienced other forms of emotional trauma or instability.
In our work together, we may weave in:
Trauma-informed coaching support rooted in nervous system awareness
Somatic practices to support steadiness and integration
Voice-based healing practices to support expression and agency
Intuitive coaching to help you reconnect with inner guidance
This is not about “fixing” you. It’s about helping you feel more supported inside yourself.
A Simple Pathway Through Grief Coaching
Grief is not linear, but having a gentle structure can help you feel less lost. Our work often moves through these stages:
First, we stabilise—supporting your nervous system and creating emotional steadiness.
Then we name what’s true—making room for what you feel without overwhelm.
Next we integrate—finding meaning, allowing complexity, and softening guilt or self-judgment.
Finally, we rebuild—creating a life that can hold grief while also holding what comes next.
How Coaching Works
All sessions are held online, so you can access this work from anywhere. I’m based in New York, and I work with clients online across the East Coast and beyond.
Coaching can be weekly or biweekly depending on your needs. Each session is a supportive blend of reflection, nervous system tools, and practical integration—so you leave with clarity and a sense of what to hold onto between sessions.
Frequently Asked Questions
What Is Grief Coaching?
Grief coaching is supportive, trauma-informed coaching that helps you navigate loss, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild steadiness. It offers space to process what you’re carrying while supporting forward movement at a pace that respects your grief.
How Is Grief Coaching Different From Grief Counseling Or Therapy?
Grief coaching is coaching, not psychotherapy or clinical treatment. I am not a licensed clinician, and I do not diagnose or provide clinical mental health care. Coaching focuses on practical support, self-trust, and integration in your daily life, with clear ethical boundaries.
Do I Need To Be Ready To Talk About My Loss?
No. Many people start coaching feeling numb, scattered, or unsure what they even want to say. We work with what’s present. Sometimes “I don’t know” is exactly where we begin.
How Long Does Grief Last?
There isn’t a universal timeline. Grief can shift over time, but it rarely follows a straight line. Coaching supports you in building steadiness and meaning without forcing you into a deadline for healing.
What If I Feel Numb, Angry, Or Even Relieved?
All of those responses can be part of grief. There is room for complexity here. Coaching offers a place where you can speak the truth of what you feel without shame.
Can Grief Coaching Help If The Loss Happened Years Ago?
Yes. Some losses take time to fully integrate—especially if you didn’t have support when they happened, or if life required you to keep going. Coaching can help you revisit grief gently and create new steadiness around it.
Is Online Grief Coaching Effective?
For many people, yes. Being in your own space can make it easier to soften, feel, and integrate what comes up. Online coaching also makes consistent support available regardless of location.
Is This Coaching Available Outside New York?
Yes. Sessions are offered online and are available regardless of where you live. While I’m based in New York, my coaching is not location-limited.
Begin Grief Coaching
If you’re grieving and you’re tired of carrying it alone—or tired of feeling like you’re supposed to be “past it”—grief coaching may offer the kind of support you’ve been missing.
You don’t have to rush your healing. You don’t have to make it look good. You only have to begin where you are.
When you’re ready, I invite you to reach out and start this work together.